Marriage is not for wimps. Anyone who is married, or has been married before, knows that it takes determined love, forgiveness, understanding, commitment, a degree of compromise, and so much more to make a marriage successfully last. Andrea and I have been through our share of ups and downs together. We have experienced times of great happiness and joy, when our lives seemed to be perfectly aligned and all was well, as well as times of distress and struggle, when internal and external factors seemed like they were almost too much for us to handle. Our love has been tested more than once. This is why we believe love is a choice. Of course, there are plenty of times when our emotions and feelings accompany our decisions with great happiness, desire, hope, interest...etc. The problem with subscribing to the philosophy of "falling in love" is that you could very well endanger your future-self with the feelings or emotional response of "falling out of love." Some of the hardest battles to win are the invisible ones fought in our mind and heart, remembering our willpower tends to follow after our heart and its desires.
We choose to love each other in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer...you know the rest. We choose to love each other when sometimes it seems life would be easier to simply not. Love is not for wimps. I hope and pray you find yourself choosing to love your family, friends, and even society all around you. Though at times we will be tested, Love Endures All Things.

There is a difference between surviving and thriving. Many times we cannot change our surrounding circumstances. They often are what they are. To be honest, we do not have control over most things happening in the world today, although we can control certain things within our individual life and local surroundings. When the storms of life come, especially those beyond our reach of control, we have various ways to respond. Will we stand up for what we know to be moral and right, or will we sit down, perhaps even hiding until the situation has come and gone? In every situation we have the ability to barely scrape by and get through it, in essence surviving, or we have the opportunity to make the most of it while doing what we know is right and gaining experience along the way, in essence thriving.
     Thriving involves reading the situation at hand, evaluating the best way to help better yourself and others around you, and praying for God to show you where He is in all of it. Trust me, God is there. Nothing is too small nor too big for God to be a part of. God cares about the grand-scheme of the universe and He cares about the way you are feeling on a bad day. He cares about the oceans as well as the streams. He cares about you. He cares about your family, friendships, and your daily life. God cares about everyone else around you as well.
     Now is the time to open our eyes spiritually and see through His eyes. Now is the time to feel what He feels, hear what He hears, and act as He would act. Now is the time for deep empathy, understanding what is at stake with lost and hurting people all across the world as well as right next door. We will make it through any challenge presented, because we are a resilient people. However, it matters how we get there. We must choose to also care about the "why" and "how" which lead and motivate the "what" in everything we say and do. Now is the time to carry a deep sense of responsibility for others, while operating in and through the HOPE OF THE WORLD, Jesus Christ. Choose today to thrive where you're planted. To quote Frozen 2, "Do the next right thing."

You have probably heard the old saying "if you can't do something right, don't do it at all," or perhaps "if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself!"  This is, unfortunately, a common mind set for many people. The first idea, that anyone should be able to do something perfect the first time they try, is so far fetched that it often holds us back from ever trying anything new. The second saying is just as dangerous, in that we expect perfection from others to such a degree that we never let go of control in fear they might not meet our expectation. Or, just perhaps, we fear that they will do a good job and, just possibly, even outshine us with their performance. But I digress...
     You would not expect the girls in the picture to get the jenga as high as it can go without dropping it the first time they played! In fact, you should not expect perfection the second time, third time, fourth time, and so on. It's hard, and only people who dedicate themselves to practice and daily discipline will be the ones to improve and possibly get to that level.
     We cannot let the fear of possible failure stop us from trying new things, and we cannot let our ego, pride, or idea of being judged by others for missing the perfect mark, stop us from picking up new things! When we constantly compare ourselves to others we run the risk of never moving forward, learning new things, and it is possible that will not live up to the calling and purpose that God has for our lives. We have to listen to Him, be obedient and willing, and understand that life is about the small things. Life is about progressing towards the goal one inch at a time, not trying to teleport straight to the finish line. We learn from Ecclesiastes 11:4 that circumstances may not always be what we  desire, but they are what they are. Live life, enjoy your life, and don't be afraid to try new things. Get a little better every day.

This is part 3 of 3 in a series on managing stress. In part 1 we learned that sometimes we need to just take a step back and Breathe In, Breathe Out. In part 2 we discovered that not all stress is bad, in fact Eustress Is Good Stress. Now, for the final part of this series, we have to face the fact that some stress is bad, or negative, stress. This kind of stress keeps us awake at night. This kind of stress takes away our appetite for food, fellowship, fun, and relaxation. It has a tendency to simply dominate our  thoughts, and thus our peace.
Distress is defined as negative, bad, or detrimental stress. It is the kind of stress that does not propel us towards excellence, but rather brings us down and causes us to feel defeated. People have been going through times of distress since the fall of man. In Psalm 22 we read "My God, my God, why have you abandoned me? Why are you so far away when I groan for help? Every day I call to You, my God, but you do not answer. Every night I lift my voice, but I find no relief."  We can read the same words from the first part of this verse again in Matthew 27:46, as Jesus was hanging on the cross and said "Eli, Eli, lema sabacthani" - which means My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?
We feel distressed when we feel abandoned. Abandoned by God, our family, our friends, our work, our church, or even abandoned by hope itself. When we do not see the light at the end of the tunnel, we can easily lose hope and give in to despair. In times like this we must make the conscious decision to turn our eyes towards God and His Word. 1st Peter 5:6 & 7 reminds us: "So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time He will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you." Today it is my hope and prayer that we all turn our eyes towards Jesus Christ, the hope of the world.

This is part 2 of 3 in a series on managing stress. We often have negative feelings associated with the word stress. When you hear someone say "I have been feeling very stressed lately at work" it generally makes you think of an undesired, negative stress that is causing unwanted strain. However, there is also a good kind of stress. Eustress is defined as positive, good, or beneficial stress. Eustress is the kind of stress that pushes us to the next level of performance or achievement when we need to get something done. Eustress can benefit us emotionally, psychologically, and physically. It might have caused you stress to meet the tight deadline, but in doing so you utilized eustress and achieved something that gives you the feeling of accomplishment. Having successfully met the deadline you now feel happy, motivated, and you will probably have more confidence in yourself the next time you face a tight deadline.
Exercising is another good example of eustress. It pushes your body to the limit, exceeding what is comfortable for you, and brings you to a new level of performance. After you exercise and recover, your body has now built endurance and stronger muscles for a better performance the next time. We were created to push the limits. We were created to strive for new heights and abilities. Sometimes we can only achieve our created intention by allowing ourselves to be stressed, and stretched, to new levels outside our normal comfort zones. 

This is part 1 of 3 in a series on managing stress. Many times the  tyranny of the urgent seemingly sneaks up on us "out of nowhere" only to dominate and overwhelm us from the inside-out. You know the feeling -- increased heart rate, frustration that simply takes the best words out of our mouth, headache, pressure in our head or at the top of our neck... In the heat of the moment our character will (or unfortunately, will not) shine through as we react to the stress and pressure out of instinct. It is in times like this we should remember to take a deep breath. Breathe in for 5 counts, hold for 5 counts, breathe out for 5 counts, hold for 5 counts, and repeat. The power of pausing for a deep breath, taking a step back, and remembering that God is in control and we can ask for His peace in any situation we face, is critical. It is generally best to choose response over reaction, so I advise taking a deep breath and tackling stressful situations with a clear mind and peaceful heart. We are going to see in the next episode that not all stress is bad stress, in fact some stress is good stress, as it can propel us to succeed and push forward with our goals. 

Faith and fear are both extensions of belief. Faith is believing that something positive and desirable will come to pass, while fear is believing that something negative and undesirable will come to pass.  In light of this, we should strive to choose faith over fear when situations are out of our control. Fear, which often stems from anxiety (a feeling of worry or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome) can easily grab hold of our attention, thoughts, and heart. We must pray that God will give us the courage and strength to choose faith over fear, even in the midst of uncertainty and circumstances that are outside of our control. As the Bible reminds us in Hebrews 11:1 - "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Today, let's choose faith over fear.